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Choosing, breathing, and allowing. That’s how you give birth to anything: a delicious meal, a new business venture, or a new human being. This is a story of how my partner and I chose to host another child in our family, how we breathed with our choices, and how the easiest way came to us when we allowed. Even for us, two old Shaumbra souls, active Crimson Circle participants, Advanced Studies Teachers, experienced breathers... it’s so exciting to see the results; they amaze us, too!

In principle, the pregnancy went smoothly, the birth according to our wishes, and I have been recovering faster than expected. Yet, I am what they call “an older mum” as I’m way past the “magical” age of 35, generally viewed as “too old to conceive and carry.” I also smoke, enjoy my wine and beer, and don’t really eat meat. Oh, and I don’t exercise. On top of this, we had chosen to give birth at home as naturally as possible, in France, where the absolute majority of births take place at hospitals. None of this became an issue for us.

Feeling-choosing works for us. We consciously chose this pregnancy. We chose to welcome this particular One into our family. We had already been in contact with this soul a few years earlier, during the first pregnancy, and last summer we felt into when the time would be right. We conceived when we wanted to and with a celebration (yes, as in fruit and sparkling wine, breathing...), and started waiting. We chose to keep it to ourselves as long as possible; to keep it as our experience and not someone else’s; to keep our space free of external influences as much as possible, without going into hiding. We chose our midwives, we chose an Adoula, and we chose ease & grace.

Like with our first born, we wanted to have the luxury of extra support from an Adoula, a birthing professional who focuses on making a connection with the soul of the incoming being. As we’re experienced in this type of work ourselves, we chose to do the first part by ourselves. This meant taking really good care of ourselves, breathing, and making some changes in what we ate to support life.

We connected with the incoming soul every evening through the breath. When Kathleen Haws, our chosen Adoula, stepped in, she further helped us with the connection. And she did so wonderfully! Even Shaumbra Masters like us do not need to be totally independent, and, at that point of pregnancy, just before the third trimester, it felt truly wonderful to let her lead the way and support our choices.

The rest of the story falls down to allowing. Allowing the beautifully orchestrated development of the baby’s body, allowing as much ease & grace for the mother as possible, and allowing support for the father. Of course the father is also “pregnant” and goes through his own changes in preparation for the expansion and birth. So, allowing basically meant making choices and then letting it all come to us. It was not always easy, but was absolutely doable, and most of the time a joy! As issues surfaced, we stayed conscious of them, and breathed with our Adoula.

Allowing is also the way to do the DreamWalk to connect with the incoming soul. Birthing in the New Energy relies greatly on making and maintaining a connection. The feeling-level communication creates a feeling of safety and joy for all parties: we knew who was coming in, we could send tasters from Earth, radiate our love, and meet as equals. All those times I felt us dancing on the field… three free souls meeting by choice, celebrating our creations. The incoming soul feels this, the journey to Earth becomes easier and the body-soul integration can happen a lot faster. And, of course, the physical birthing itself is an act of allowing: any force or resistance will simply hurt. I still hear the midwife’s wise words during active labour, “Accept, accept…”

They truly amaze us, even though we knew there was every chance of experiencing the ease & grace we had chosen. We chose when to conceive, who we wanted to host, how we wanted to give birth, when we wanted to give birth, and where. These were not carved in stone, we did not force an outcome, and we stayed flexible enough to respond to anything that might be unexpected. Even the birthing date changed a few times as things around us changed. But when the decision was made, we stayed with it: the 4 April 2014. It felt like a fun date, all fresh – and, obviously, a “44 day.” It felt good to choose this “new,” balanced date!

So, in the evening of 3 April just before our last Adoula session, my partner felt very strongly he was ready. Green light and knowing “which button to push for extra energy.” On 4 April just past midnight, once our son had gone to bed, I allowed my body to go into labour. And it did, in an hour from whispering “Go!” We breathed in the birthing room that we had just got organised, played soft music, dimmed the lights, and waited. We called the midwives as late as we could and they arrived just in time for the final stage.

In the early, quiet hours of the day, the Little One was born. The body and the soul finally merged, and started their journey in the physical. The second I held him (a boy, as it turned out), he confirmed a name we had heard before. I heard it whispered in my ear three times. My partner confirmed and we only needed to decide on the spelling. Half an hour later, the new big brother woke up, all excited to see what was going on. We were now four.

We did not have to drive to a hospital, my partner was there with me the whole time, our Adoula got updates via Skype messages and kept breathing with us, our toddler was completely undisturbed and then immediately participating in the welcoming, and I was not pushed into doing anything I didn’t want to. I was so happy that we all got to stay at home getting to know this new being that had come to stay with us. No complications and a fast recovery for us all.

We extend our gratitude to our wonderful Birthing Team of three unconventional midwives and one amazing Adoula, and through our Adoula and those behind the veil, to the DreamWalker Birth materials by Crimson Circle! However, the biggest gratitude we feel is for ourselves. For diving into that river, allowing the water carry us, and letting the waterfall take us to the magical, still pond beneath, the one of Birthing into Life.

Maija Leisso and Ruben Proost are a passionate Shaumbra couple who found their way to the Crimson Circle over ten years ago. They are both Advanced Studies Teachers (SES and Aspectology). Maija is also a Mentor Teacher and Ruben a New Breath Teacher. For two years, they have lived in sunny Southern France. After leaving their home countries Finland and the Netherlands, as well as their old jobs, they have now chosen to focus on family life. They both work from home, sing in the local choir, and enjoy discovering new potentials. 

For more information about conscious birthing, check out DreamWalker Birth by Adamus Saint-Germain.

Kathleen Haws is a certified Adoula and DreamWalker Birth teacher and teacher trainer. Visit her website at

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