I will never forget the moment when I first encountered a Tobias channel almost 20 years ago. Someone had sent a couple of the monthly “Lessons” to my brother, who printed them out to share with me. I still remember where I was sitting as tears fell and I was filled with an indescribable feeling of finally being home.

I had been studying, searching and learning all my life, beginning with my childhood religion and moving on to an ever-broadening understanding of reality. After devouring the metaphysical section in the small local library, I’d sneak off to the New Age bookstore, browsing the shelves, looking for… something. Occasionally I’d run across bits of information that rang true, but they were few and far between. The Crimson Circle messages, however, were like an oasis in the desert. I quickly dropped all other teachers and dived in, soaking up every word and renewing my ancient friendship with dear Tobias.

What a journey it’s been. I was a good student, of course, propelled by a constant drive to understand and get it right. And Tobias was a wonderful teacher, helping me learn to love myself, be myself, trust myself, integrate myself. At times it felt like a long, hard slog through the darkness, but I trusted my guide and knew it was the right direction. Surely, one day, I would get there.

Beloved Tobias eventually bid farewell – a day forever etched in my memory – and entrusted his seat on the Crimson Council to Adamus Saint-Germain. Things with Crimson Circle quickly began to evolve. It no longer felt like a loving grandfather sharing his wisdom on a long country drive; now it was more like “Get in, sit down, shut up and hold on – or leave!” This professor wasn’t accepting students; he was trying to rouse the faculty.

I suppose when you wake up in a classroom with amnesia, it’s natural to assume you’re a student. You can pace around the hallways and pore over the books for years, but at some point, it’s time to remember what you already know, step out of the game, and move to the head of the class. The real students are looking for you, and that’s what the recent Time of the Merlin event signified to me, that the game of pretending is over. No more excuses.

At the human level, Time of the Merlin was a high intensity production that unfolded over many weeks. And it’s not even finished! (As of this writing, the e-reader is still in production and translations haven’t yet started.) Incidentally, by the time any presentation is completed and published in the Channel Library or Crimson Circle store, I have personally gone through the material at least four times. It’s an amazing job; I just have to remember to come up for air!

This epic event required a lot of preparation and planning. What entities would be coming in? What human presenters would be appropriate? How many sessions each day? What about the stage sets? (That’s more Peter’s department, but all of us are involved.) What’s the overall vibe? What surprises are still pending?

A very special part of this particular event was called Divine Courage, a segment where Shaumbra from around the world shared their wisdom. It was profound in its simplicity and beauty. Over a couple of months, we set aside several days to meet with the Shaumbra interviewees in the studio. Linda handled the invitations, scheduling and the actual interviews. Peter and Marc set up all the equipment and lighting for each shoot. Gaelon ran around town picking up gear, batteries, lunches and whatever else was needed. And I was there to welcome the interviewees, let them know what to expect, offer refreshments, and in general help them feel at ease. Because no matter how relaxed you are, having cameras and floodlights suddenly in your face can be a bit intimidating!

Those few days of recording surprised us with their intensity. The actual tasks were easy enough, but we could feel an “effort” going into the project. I began to realize it was some kind of birth – and significant one – and we were feeling the effort required to bring this new creation into the world. It felt like Divine Courage was the beginning of something important.

Then there were the channels. That, of course, is Geoff’s department, and as he learned who would be speaking, he let the staff know. It soon became clear that some of the channels would need to be pre-recorded. It’s a huge commitment of time, energy and integrity to open up and deeply connect with an entity, particularly one less familiar in the process, so we scheduled more days at the studio.

This work is amazing, but it comes with a personal impact, and I for one was glad to be pre-recording these messages. One of them was FM, who I will probably accidentally call “John” for many more years. He was my friend. His dry wit and blunt manner didn’t suit everyone, but I loved it. No gossip, no guessing, no time spent on frivolous pleasantries – it was perfect for my introverted, socially awkward self and we worked together very well. Then he got sick. Then he died. Dammit John! Although I’ve communicated with him since then, I wondered how it would feel when Geoff channeled him. (This has got to be one of the weirdest job situations in the world – a deceased coworker speaking through the boss about yet another project!)

The crew can always feel the energy during a channel; sometimes it feels light and easy, sometime more like a marathon of heavy lifting. With FM, it was familiar yet different; a little bit John, mostly FM, and all straightforward business. What he had to say was probably the most relatable, inspiring and helpful part of the entire event, but I was glad we didn’t have to manage the live webcast at the same time. A lot of breathing required.

Then there was Mark Twain. A number of years ago I had a string of curious experiences with him that reopened a very personal connection. The stories are tucked away, but to me he was never just another lifetime of St. Germain like Shakespeare or some rabbi. I knew Mark Twain (not how you might expect), and that personal connection overshadowed any “back story” shared by Adamus. What would it be like during HIS channel? Fortunately, we had plenty of notice, and it was helpful to deal with my own stuff beforehand, because I really wanted to do a good job for him.

Then it was time and there he was – the beloved storyteller and crusty old man I remembered, even if he was wearing the face of my boss and friend. It was an experience far outside of time and space, far beyond loss, far outside all limitation. It was just plain far out.

There was a lot of other preparation also to be done for Time of the Merlin. Video editing and creative assistance. Credit rolls, slides, schedules and cue sheets planned out down to the minute. Coordination of dozens of parts and pieces between more than ten team members to create a seamless online experience for Shaumbra.

Finally, it’s time to go live. Slide is up, timer keyed in, mobile phones off, last minute mic and hair check. Cue up the video roll-ins, set the camera angles, bring up the lights, prompt Geoff & Linda – and we’re off and rolling! Now we just have to keep it going, stay in the flow, be ready with the next media to run, cue up the break timer and, above all, keep up with the entity on stage, regardless of what reality-shifting stuff they might be saying.

At some point, I realize I’m witnessing a profound Point of Separation for all of us. Although we’ve mostly released the student role, a lot of Shaumbra still like sitting in the back of the classroom, doodling on our notepads and avoiding attention. But our game of hide and seek is over. As that ‘wise teacher’ vibe starts emanating, the ‘clueless student’ disguise is just not going to work anymore. Better said, Merlins tend to stand out from the crowd, and your glow is getting brighter.

Feel what that means. Merlin doesn’t hide away from the world; he engages with life, somehow appearing exactly where he’s needed. Merlin doesn’t doubt herself anymore, she just knows – and goes wherever the knowing leads. Merlins are at peace with themselves, yet definitely not passive. They allow the magic to unfold, along with the absolute knowing that the outcome can be nothing else than perfect.

Yes, dear Shaumbra, it’s a turning point. We’re done searching, seeking, learning, and practicing. It’s time for living, radiating, showing up, and engaging with life, all from a place of profound self-love. I mean, look where you started and how far you’ve come! Look how present you finally are with yourself. What’s not to love?

Wait, if you have an answer to that, if there’s still something you don’t love about you or your life, just take another look at it through your Merlin eyes. What a Merlin beholds becomes real. What a Merlin experiences becomes true. The world is ready to be seen through the eyes and touched by the heart of Merlin.

It’s time.

P.S. If you’d like to experience Time of the Merlin for yourself, click here.

2 comments on "A Turning Point"

  • Denise Crispino on October 13, 2021 9:52 PM said:
    Amei!!# Gratidão querida Jean!
  • Claire on October 8, 2021 1:56 PM said:
    I don't know if you read these comments but hope you know, somehow, how grateful I (and I'm sure many others) am to you for all your professional work bringing us broadcasts and also your words of wisdom. I never fail to gain something from your words, always feel your empathy on this journey. My very best wishes to you. :-)

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