Last night passed without sleep: we were launching Mark Twain’s channel (from last year’s Time of the Merlin) at 3 am my time, and my flight was at 6 am.
Dozing off in the plane I drifted into a few-seconds-long dream-blur where I was conversing with what appeared to be another me, sitting across the room. I was listening to all the doubts, complaints and fears, nodding rhythmically. Then I got up abruptly and uttered a firm, “That’s enough! Just give it all up, throw it away. You are ready, I am ready, let’s do it.”
“Yes, master Merlin,” replied the other me, with a military-style salute.
I woke up laughing at the Merlin bossing in my dreams.
This identity dissociation started after the recent Keahak channel where Adamus asked... insisted that we act and talk like a Master, first of all with ourselves. And so I did. It was too much in my face this time to skip the nudge.
The first few days it was terribly awkward. I didn’t know where to start, couldn’t even imagine how Me-Master would behave, talk, feel & perceive.
Fast-forward one week and it’s smoothing in pretty frictionless. There are moments now when I kinda flip and start to genuinely feel as a Master. Brief moments. But even then I am capable of feeling his-mine one desire, “our” dream.
He wishes to fulfill his purpose, which is to meld his wisdom with a human and live out the new form of existence that the soul has not yet experienced before.
Me-Human never had many dreams, but one was very prominent. It was magical, tangible yet elusive, fulfilling and engaging: ever since encountering Crimson Circle in 2009, I wanted to become a part of it in one capacity or another, to co-create, work together. I always felt that I had already been a part of it in the past.
Funny enough, today, exactly as I write this, is my 1st anniversary of working with CC. The whole year flew by at lightning speed. The first few months were surreal as I couldn’t really believe it. But when it settled down, I have to say it’s a thrill and it’s not easy, but it is rewarding in multiple ways.
I can’t even describe the feeling that fills me so completely at moments when I am listening to a freshly released Crimson Circle product and it once again touches me so deep in my core, where no other material could penetrate, and then I suddenly remember that now I’m directly involved in a co-creation of the materials and especially in spreading the word to new potential Shaumbra who might be touched in the very same way.
That’s the part of who I am now, the part of my Grandness.
Even now while typing this, I feel it once again. I also feel my fellow Shaumbra travellers and the privilege I possess to be able to share with you.
Apart from that and, maybe, a desire to travel, the only thing of true importance for me is Realization. I literally feel almost a thirst to feel other parts of my whole Self that has been forgotten. That’s my holy grail and my ultimate freedom.
A few days ago, I realized that in their core, both my Human and Master facets desire the very same thing, simply seeing it from their own perspective. So why is it not happening?
Well, the Master says it’s because the Human is still afraid to truly Allow. It still needs some reassurance, some tangible experiences of other realms and its whole Self. Oh, how I would love to feel it in the same way as, I assume, Sam feels the wholeness of To-Bi-Wah in his everyday existence on Earth, having an ultimate friend always by his side.
I hope to meet that Sneaky Ascended Master (I’m sure that’s the real meaning behind SAM acronym) in the flesh at some point, but for now his upcoming channel will do just fine. The previous one in Bled in 2018 during Magic of the Masters was one of the biggest Points of Separation in my life and I have a feeling the next one will be as well.
With the same enthusiasm, I have missed meeting my non-discorporate Shaumbra friends irl (in real life). I have very high hopes for the year 2023 and the potential of doing the Merlin gathering in person where we can once again blissfully laugh, hug and get wasted like in the good old pre-Covid days. (Will this really happen? I can dream….) But this September we are once again gathering in spirit (nowadays called online). Maybe we can at least do some onscreen tequila shots again!
By the way, if you remember the Time of the Merlin event last year, I had the immense honor of talking about my deepest letting go and integrations. I have never ever shared those with any person or group. Apparently, my speech was so unbearably brilliant and unbeatable that this year Geoff decided not to invite any guest speakers and stick to channeling only.
Oh, and if you wanna get a free ticket, Adamus promised it to a person who can track down Sam in real life and bring him to Colorado this September. (That’s a joke, sadly.)
Anyway, see – or rather feel – you there!
Don’t miss the upcoming Dream of the Merlin event! With an amazing lineup of guest entities including Sam, Merlin, Nikola Tesla, St. Germain and more, it promises to be an unforgettable event.
Dream of the Merlin
September 10–11, 2022