The Merlin I Am Series

SHOUD 2 – Featuring ADAMUS SAINT-GERMAIN, channeled by Geoffrey Hoppe

Presented to the Crimson Circle
November 7, 2020

I Am that I Am. Ah! No finer words ever spoken than “I Am that I Am.”

I Am Adamus of Sovereign Domain, here with each and every one of you for what you call your November Shoud, Shoud 2 of the Merlin I Am Series.

As I come in here through Cauldre, Linda, the crew here in Kona and all of you, I take a moment to smell the air. Mm. So beautiful here, so fragrant, so fresh. Ah! And a moment to have a sip of coffee, wonderful Kona coffee, not to be promoting anything, but to enjoy the richness of life, of human life.

It might be difficult for some of you to grab that, to really feel it once in a while, because in all the human lifetimes it’s been tough. It’s been difficult. A lot of challenges, especially this lifetime; probably the hardest lifetime you’ve ever had, because you’ve been more conscious. You’ve had more desire to go through changes. You’ve had more releases than in any other lifetime. So I would venture to say probably your hardest lifetime, a lifetime of changes.

But here we are, able to be together. Ah! Here we are a Master, Cauldre, channeling a Master, me, to all the Masters, you. I’m truly impressed by how far we’ve come against a lot of odds, against a lot of circumstances and situations in the midst of the great pandemic on the planet, in the midst of all the craziness, which is not yours, by the way. It’s not yours.


Beauty and Longing

One thing that you’ll be noticing, if you haven’t already noticed it, is this sense that you’ve always had, but it starts to come forth now, a sense of Beauty. When the music plays,* such beauty. You know, this sense of Beauty has been hidden for a long time. There’s been so many other things coming into your mind and emotions, that sense of Beauty simply wasn’t really available to come forward. But a true sense of Beauty, and you don’t have to work at it. It happens as a Master. It just starts coming forth, coming to the surface.
* This song was played just before the channel

There are some interesting dynamics that take place right now. There’s a deep sense of longing, but not a lost longing. You’ve been through that phase when you first went through your awakening or maybe even before, but a sense of longing, knowing that there was something more, but it was like lost. It was out of grasp, out of reach. You knew it was there, kind of like on a dark night in the forest; you know there are things that are there, but you just don’t see them. And then as you come to this point, that longing becomes more intense and deeper, more sensual.

But now, instead of longing for something distant and unknown, there’s a longing that is very palpable, very clear, right there. You know it’s there. You don’t have to work at it. Maybe you still don’t quite understand what that rich, beautiful longing is, but that’s what happens when the human, the Master, the I Am all start into the integration, the deep integration of embodied mastery.

And then there’s that feeling of having missed that connection for so long, having missed knowing Spirit within you, having missed all that you really are, all of your senses, all the magic that you really are. And so this sense of longing is no longer a lost longing, but now it’s like a knowingness longing that it’s coming right now. That brings about a sense of Beauty, the richness of life.

You know, when you’re not trying to change the world anymore, when you’re not even trying to change yourself anymore, when you’re accepting all that you are, when you’re allowing, now that sense of Beauty comes up and it’s in everything. It’s in the music. It’s in nature. It’s within your very being. It’s very real, visceral.

One of the things that’s always sad to watch with humans going through what they go through, especially as they go into awakening, is the sensuality seems to fade away, go into nothingness. Things become so mental and so linear. And actually, they really aren’t any more mental and linear; just now, when somebody comes into awakening, you’re realizing now how linear and mental things have been. So you’re much more aware of it. But you come to this point and it’s not like that anymore. It’s not linear. It’s not mental. That sense of Beauty that actually some of you have been afraid of, the sense of Sensuality that some of you have resisted, it starts coming forth, and you don’t have to work at it. It’s just there. You’re suddenly aware of the richness of life.

Part of this is also caused by the fact that there’s a knowingness that this is, for most of you, going to be your last life on the planet, and it’s time you start looking at things with a different perspective. You start looking at things, well, with that longing, knowing that this is going to be the last lifetime when you can go for the long walks in the forests of this Earth. You’ll be able to take this with you, but nothing quite like the reality here – the forests and the sky and the birds and food and all these beautiful – and music and just the sound of people laughing and even crying – but all this beauty.

It’s a little bit melancholy, but it’s very, very beautiful, and that’s what happens when you come to this point. Beauty emerges, and that’s a good one for – we talked about beauty in our last Shoud – we’re talking about this new Merlin’s Handbook for Embodied Realization, we talked about beauty. But beauty emerges, it comes forth, and you find yourself now surrounded by it, especially as you realize that all the energy is yours. Now you feel yourself surrounded by beauty. Not all the time. No, not when necessarily when you’re sitting in traffic or if you’re listening to some of this hardcore news that some of you have been listening to. Nothing wrong with the news, but some of you really go for the hardcore stuff.

But this beauty emerges and then there are unbelievable quiet, profound moments when you’re no longer really searching for answers. A lot of times in the past you had these quiet, profound moments, but you were searching and looking, and now you realize you’re there. You’re there and now you can enjoy the beauty without fearing your own sensuality, without fearing beauty itself. Yeah, people, they get afraid of beauty, because they think they have to have so many rules in their life for themselves. They think they have to stay very linear and strict and have timetables and goals and every- … pffff! That all goes out the door with the Master. Now is the time for beauty.

Take a deep breath and invite it in, because it’s coming, if it’s not already there.

Beauty, in a way, that at times brings you to tears when you hear a beautiful piece of music or you see a music video. You know, I didn’t have music videos in my time. It was just music; it was auditory – of course, unless you went to the concert – but now you’ve got music videos to add to the sense and add to the Beauty. Incredible.

So, let’s take a deep breath together, as we dive into Shoud 2 of the Merlin I Am Series.


Conversation with Edith

There’s been a lot of deaths in the Shaumbra family this year. A lot of them. A lot of Shaumbra just saying, “Eh, I’m just going to opt out. I’m just going to leave.” Some, like Sart, allowing in their Realization days or weeks before they leave. Some doing it just a moment before they leave. Some saying, “You know, it’s just too tough right now. This body and all this stuff we’re up against, I’m just going to leave and come back when it’s right.” There’s a lot of Shaumbra whose names don’t appear on your website on the “In Memoriam” who have left, and they’re coming to one of the New Earths where it’s a very special place for those who are really – they’ve just completed their second to the last lifetime, they need rejuvenation, they’re going to come back – but they’re going to really do it as a Master this time.

So, I’d be remiss if I didn’t mention Edith. Edith.

Dear Edith passed away just two days ago. Oh, and Linda’s going to put up her picture here.

Edith has been on her way out for a little while now. As you know, Edith, as delightful as she is, was a bit stubborn. You may have realized that during some of the Shouds. Edith basically left about a month ago. Not the physical body, but her essence left about a month ago and she was just waiting. You know, it doesn’t seem like a month when you’re waiting in kind of the in-between realms. But she left about a month ago and finally just the other day released the last of her physical body.

I sat with her as this occurred. It was a beautiful moment for me and for her. She was kind of – it would be like watching yourself with the last of the flames in the embers slowly fading out. The last, if it was like a fireplace, just like the last to flicker out, and she experienced this. She witnessed it. It’s interesting because you don’t really feel that, I mean, not in a physical way, if you ever go through that. But you’re very aware of it. You’re very aware that the last, you could say, connection to the planet is gone now.

Edith and I sat there for a good long bit, and I use the term “sitting there,” but in a way it kind of was because we’ve both been human. We knew what it was like just to sit. We just sat there quietly for a while.

You know, Edith and I, we’ve known each other for many lifetimes. In the Shouds, we had a lot of ‘go at its’ with each other. I loved inviting Edith up on stage, because I knew she would be such an example, such a beauty for everyone. Edith had her ways. Edith had her definite ways. She became an icon for Shaumbra all around the world. But we sat there for a good long time, and at that point – excuse me, Edith (reaching past her photo for his coffee) – at that point I said, “Edith, where to now? What do you want to do?”

And she said, “I want to go to Theos. I need to rejuvenate. I need to have my own space. I need to integrate everything I did as a human on the planet. I just need to get away from everything. I don’t want to go to the Near Earth realms. I know I’ll run into family and that wouldn’t be such a good thing. I want that …” – she called it a spa, like a spiritual spa in Theos.

So, I walked with her there, and I know some of the rest of you were with her, doing a DreamWalk or just thinking about her, and walked her to Theos and said, “Edith, I’ll be back in a couple of days,” which is today. I’m going to invite Edith in for a moment to give some of her thoughts and perspectives. If you don’t mind, Linda, can she have your chair?

LINDA: Of course.


LINDA: Absolutely.

ADAMUS: Yes. So …

LINDA: Here you go.

ADAMUS: … let’s all breathe Edith in right now, into Shoud 2 of the Merlin I Am Series. Take a good deep breath. Oh, Edith. Edith is resisting, like, remember like she used to resist walking up on the stage, but she actually really loved it. So Edith, welcome. I hope everyone can see you, if not feel you here.

So Edith, I mentioned to everybody that you went to Theos. You’re actually in Theos right now. What about embodied Realization? Why didn’t you stay?

And I’m going to be translating Edith for those of you who don’t hear, kind of like Vili translates in Spanish. So, Edith, why didn’t you stay?

And I’d like you to feel her answer as well before I translate. And Edith, in her Edith way, is saying, “Well, it was just too difficult. Too difficult. I waited and waited, and nothing happened. I had no money, none of this abundance that you talk about Adamus, and I finally, just – my body gave out.”

Okay, Edith. Edith, are you going to come back to Earth for another lifetime?

(slight pause)


Edith, you normally would say that would almost kind of a rough voice and you’d probably say something like, “No!” But here you’re telling us yes. You’re going to be coming back for another lifetime. Why is that, Edith? 


Well, Edith has something she’d like to share with everybody, a number of things.

Edith says, first of all, she wants to come back because there was something in her life that was really missing – a number of things, if I’m not mistaken, but there was one thing that was really missing in your life – and that was her lost love. Her lost love, a lover who she had spent many, many lifetimes with who was not here in this lifetime. They had made a vow to each other a long time ago, and she’s telling me from even the times of Yeshua. They made a vow that they were going to come back together for their ascension, what we now call Realization, and the one that she was hoping to meet in this lifetime never came along. So, she waited and waited and waited. She wasn’t necessarily consciously aware of this, but she dreamed about it a lot at night, this true love of all of her lives. They wanted to do their ascension together. She actually said that in one lifetime they took their own lives together, thinking that was the way, but found out that it didn’t lead to ascension.

She came into this lifetime in 1938 hoping that her – and Edith, I don’t want to call it a soulmate; I know that was your term there that you used, or twin flame either – but hoping that her true love would be there also, that she would find him or he would find her, and the years passed. Oh, her childhood years, and of course she didn’t necessarily expect him then. Then her teenage years and he wasn’t there. She was filled with great sadness, but she kept on waiting, waiting, waiting. She had a few other relationships, had children as a result of them, but they were never real loves in her life. They were more, well, just placeholders. And she actually – yeah, she interjects – that she actually kind of felt guilty about her other relationships that she had, like maybe she was betraying her true lover.

She waited and waited and waited and waited, kind of sitting – I hope you don’t mind me saying this, Edith – but sitting in the same chair, never moving, afraid that if she moved to a different chair, meaning if she changed things in her life, that she would miss an opportunity for this true love to find her. So she sat in the same chair year after year, meaning that she didn’t want to do anything that might possibly affect, might possibly make it so he couldn’t find her.

She had a lonely heart, she says. She even named her real estate company that she had “Heart Realty,” thinking maybe this would put out some sort of energy or vibration so that he could find her, but he never came along. She waited and waited and didn’t change that chair. She didn’t allow in the energies of herself, of abundance into her life. She didn’t really let other people all that close into her life, because she was waiting.

Then about a month ago when she really made her real transition, she realized that the one that was her true love was actually killed at an early age in this lifetime, and that he would never meet her now. She realized when she started crossing over a month ago that he was always there for her, encouraging her for her own Realization saying, “Edith! Edith! Do it! I’ll follow up. I’ll come in later, but do it for yourself now.” But, no, Edith sat in the same chair, didn’t make the changes.

So, I ask you, “Edith, any regrets?”

(slight pause)

Hm. Only that he didn’t show up, but no regrets, she says, about waiting, because the love is that deep and that great.

So Edith, what now? What now? Are you willing to do your Realization in another lifetime with or without?

(slight pause)

Well, Edith says that she knows now that it’s so important for her to allow love and abundance and her own Realization in spite of anybody else. But, given the choice, she would still rather do it with him.

So, Edith, we’d like to do a service for you here today on this Shoud. There’s not many Shaumbra that stand out as much as you did, that are an example to all of us, that are as – hope you don’t mind me saying – but as stubborn, as curmudgeon as you were. There’s not many Shaumbra that become such an icon of life itself and the challenges and the difficulties. Not so many Shaumbra that are so outspoken as you were in the Shouds.

So, Edith, we’d like to take a moment now to honor you for your lifetime, to honor you as being truly one of the very early founding Shaumbras, for bringing many others into Crimson Circle. We’d like to honor you for making us laugh. We’d like to honor you for your roughness back with me, Adamus, because I know so many other people would have loved to do that, and we’d like to honor you for your conviction, even though it caused you to stay in the same chair.

And remember, Edith, remember what I told you when we had one of our confrontations at a Shoud. Remember I said, “Edith, change that chair. Change something in your life,” because there are two options at that point. One is to – at the time I said – to live another two years and seven months. It’s been two years and five months, or you could have lived 30 or 40, 50 more years. And at that time you rolled your eyeballs when I said live 30, 40, 50 more years, because you knew within yourself that you were waiting and that lost love wasn’t going to show up at this point in your life. In other words, you were ready to move on.

That was the most important thing to you, and that, dear Edith, has a beauty in it. That beauty of loving somebody so much that you would just wait for them. The beauty of feeling into your heart every day for that person, knowing how much you’ve been through with them, knowing how much you love them; there’s nothing wrong with that.

And Edith adds to her service here that she wouldn’t necessarily recommend that to others, that the greatest love she could have given her true love was to allow her own Realization and then be here for him when his time was ready.

But Edith, we honor and bless you for all that you’ve given to Shaumbra all around the world. Let’s take a moment everyone. How about, Linda, if you wouldn’t mind coming up and some breathing in honor to Edith (Linda comes to her usual place). Don’t stand in front of her (she chuckles). Yeah. Stand right there. She’s – yeah. How about some breathing in honor of Edith, one of the classic Shaumbra of all times.


LINDA: So truly let’s take some good deep breaths. Breathe in our honor for Edith. Such a character, such an example for us. Take that good deep breath and send your love and energies to Edith, our appreciation. Breathe that appreciation that we all gained for Edith with all her antics and stubbornness. Always a true Shaumbra. Breathe in the energies of this true Shaumbra, Edith – Edith Proctor – there for us. Always there.

Take that good deep breath. Take that good deep breath.

Send your love to her. Let her feel it, the appreciation. Again, so often such an incredible example to all of us, an illustrator of so many of life’s bumps and filling.

Breathe. Breathe, as we allow Edith always.


ADAMUS: Good. Thank you and Edith is quite embarrassed in the moment, but she’s glad she’s not here physically because she’s probably all bright red in embarrassment. And she sends her love, her heart out to all Shaumbra around the world and says, “Keep on. Keep on.”

So Edith, what next? What becomes next?

(slight pause)

She said she’s going to go back to Theos for a while and really rejuvenate, get her own energy back.

And then what?

She says another lifetime on Earth. Her last life. She promises herself this time, her last lifetime.

And how long are you going to wait before you come back in?

(slight pause)

“A week!” she says. Edith, I would take it easy (Adamus chuckles). A week. I would wait.

Oh, she said she wants to come back into a Shaumbra family, a young Shaumbra family that’s thinking about having children. She would love to come in to your family with the proper upbringing. So Edith, I’d wait a little longer than a week.

So thank you. Thank you for being here and time to go back to Theos and do some rejuvenation.

Any parting words?

Hm. She said, “Ultimately, the only one you can really love is yourself, but it’s really nice having a soul lover.” Thank you, dear. Thank you.

Okay, let’s move on. Edith, what a character (Adamus chuckles). I hear you flying away, Edith. What a character. Yeah (Adamus exhales audibly, as he’s talking to Edith) Yes. Okay.

Good. So, let’s take a good deep breath.


Realizing Your Realization

Realization. We had our Summer of Realization. We have, well, close to almost 1500 Shaumbra around the world who have acknowledged their Realization, who have come out of the closet, so to speak, and I want to make a point of that today because it’s really about your perspective. It’s about realizing that you’re realized. You can continue sitting in the same chair – using the example of Edith – not moving, waiting for something, waiting for your concept of what Realization is, or you can simply change your perspective and allow it.

A lot of you are starting to come to that point, and it’s that longing point. You know it’s here, you know it’s right there, but it’s still that last little coming into Realization. That’s fine. There’s no rush into it, but if you’re wondering, if you’re puzzled – “Well, when does it come?” – it comes as soon as you say, “I am realized.”

I know there are Shaumbra around the world that are, some of them are posting on social media or even publishing books and that; some of them are saying, “Well, I know I was realized since the day I was born,” and I know it has some of you rolling your eyeballs (Adamus pauses a moment as the birds are chirping louder). A lot of bird chatter out here. I think Edith is getting everything stirred up a little bit.

Some of you are saying, “I’ve been realized since I was a child,” and that’s actually very accurate. It’s not braggadocious. It’s not like you’re trying to elevate yourself in the eyes of others. You’re suddenly realizing you’ve always been realized. Or some of you saying that you’ve had your Realization in your teenage years or young adult, and now you’re in your more senior or veteran years. Yes, you always have been realized. It’s always been there. It’s an inherent natural part of you. The question is when are you going to let yourself realize that you’re realized? It’s a matter of perspective. It’s not what you would say is a game, but it’s a matter of just admitting it, of coming out of the closet.

When you do that, when you can finally say, “I am realized” and stop going through all this mental, “Am I realized?” and “Well, if I was realized, then everything would change and suddenly I’d be able to do magic tricks.” It doesn’t work that way. It’s not like that. You acknowledge your Realization first, then the energies change. Not the other way around.

You acknowledge that, “I am realized. I’ve been on this human journey kind of lost or stuck or sitting in the same chair for a long time, but, yeah, I’m realized.” That then changes the energy. Your new perspective, a broad perspective of “I Am realized” then changes the relationship you have with energy. Then and only then do you start noticing the difference. I see a lot of you still sitting in that same chair waiting for the differences first, waiting for – I don’t know – suddenly the love of your life or to win the lottery or to suddenly have no body aches and pains. It doesn’t work like that. It’s the perspective. It’s the changing the chair, changing – to be able to say, “I am realized.”

You’re not fooling yourself by doing that. Actually, it’s quite the reverse. You’re fooling yourself by not coming out of the closet. You’re fooling yourself by waiting for something to happen, the new Big Bang or something. It’s wasting time right now. We have a lot of work ahead of us, a lot of fun ahead of us too. So it’s time to just realize that you’re realized, and then watch how things change. Then your dreams change. Then the flow of abundance changes. Then your whole attitude about life, your ability to see beauty, then it changes when you acknowledge, when you come out of the closet, “Yes, I am realized.” It’s not your ego talking. No, it’s not your ego talking.

The ego itself – I’m trying to get this right through Cauldre. The human ego actually cannot, will not say that it’s realized or enlightened. It’ll say a lot of other things. It’ll do a lot of weird things, but the ego will resist saying “I am realized.”

Feel into that for a moment.

Now, a lot of you think, “Well, so and so is telling everybody that they’re realized, and they just have a big fat ego.” No, it’s really not that, because the ego isn’t going to do that. Why?

When the human says and acknowledges that they are realized, then the ego is basically gone. The ego, as it was, will no longer exist. So the ego has really no desire to say that it’s realized. It means the end of the ego as it was. Not the end of the human identity, but the end of the ego, what you could say is the imbalance. The ego is the thing that was basically saying, “I’m all that there is. I’m the highest order of my consciousness.” But the moment you say, “I am realized. I am enlightened,” it changes all the energies. It changes the flow. It changes your thoughts. It gives you the ability to have a much broader, open view of all things, including yourself. So, no, it’s not your ego saying that you’re realized. Some of you are kind of afraid to say it – “Well, it’s just my ego and I’m not really realized and I need proof and evidence.” No, you don’t. It doesn’t work that way.

“I am realized.” Boom! Like that. And yeah, the ego is going to – you can feel the resistance – the ego is like, “Oh, you’re just making that up” or, you know, “You’re elevating yourself above others.” No, you’re not. You’re transitioning into a different role of course, but you’re not elevating yourself, because that’s foolish. Every one of them has the same natural Realization within them. They just don’t want to look at it right now.

You say, “I am realized,” and then you wait for lightning bolts or something grand to happen. No. You’ve got this tremendous amount of your energy that’s been sitting in the same chair for a long time, that’s been stuck for a long time, that’s been kind of almost foreign to you for a long time; it takes a while to turn that train around. It doesn’t happen instantly.

And you don’t have to convince yourself of this either. You don’t have to repeat it like a mantra. You don’t have to say it over and over again. It’s just realizing, “I am realized,” and then be the observer of how things start changing in your life. And, again, it’s not a race. You don’t have to force anything, but just “I am realized.”

Feel what it does to your ego when you say that, to your brain thoughts, your mind thoughts. The ego actually really kind of doesn’t like that, and it will cast doubt on it saying, “Oh, you’re just making that up.” But come back to yourself, who you truly are, “I am realized,” and then it happens.

So it’s time for all of you to come out of the closet with it. It’s not being egotistical. It’s not being artificial or unreal. It’s being more real than anything you’ve ever done in this lifetime – “I am realized.”

The nearly 1500 who have acknowledged it and who are truly realized have all had their own way of experiencing this. They’ve had that kind of an internal battle of “Am I or am I not? Am I being elitist by claiming that I’m realized? Am I really ready? Have I gone through enough experience? Have I cleared my karma?” Then they finally say, “I am realized. I’m so tired of playing the unrealized game. I am realized,” and then the energies start moving in their life. It starts moving.

Edith, for example, would not say it. Would not say it. Even when I sat with her as the last of her connections with her physical body were taking place, she wouldn’t say it. She really didn’t feel she was ready and she was waiting for her lost lover. And she thought that if she allowed that Realization, then, well, she hadn’t fulfilled their oath, their commitment to each other. So even she didn’t say it. I don’t know if she regrets that. I don’t know if – no, she doesn’t regret it. But she just wished he would have come along – she’s a little angry with him – wished he would have come along at the right time. They could have done this together, but it didn’t happen.

Time to come out of the closet. There’s a lot for us to do going forward.


Energy Acceptance

Next point on the list for today. We’ve been talking a lot about your relationship with energy, and we’ve gone through a lot of the physics. The energy is all yours. It’s all yours. I know at first it’s kind of strange thinking, “Well, you mean everything?” You look up into the stars at night. You look out onto the ocean. “It’s all mine?” Yes, it is. It’s your perception of reality, therefore it’s all yours, all your energy.

Everyone else has their own perception, their own perspective, their own energy, and as so many of you know from what we’re talking about in Keahak, there is a harmony of energies. When you get multiple souled beings together, there’s a harmony of their energies together. But it’s still their energy and yours. They’ll never come into yours, you never come into theirs, but there’s a harmony going on.

And, as we talked about recently in Keahak, there’s also a harm that takes place. When a souled being forgets who they are, when they believe they have to go outside of themselves for the energy, when they won’t allow the energy to serve them, when energy is used to hold others down, when there’s manipulation, then instead of harmony there is a harm that takes place.

But basically all energy is here to serve you, and what I really want to do today is ask you to open up now and let it in. We’ve talked a lot about it in theory, in concept, but today with all of you in this Shoud, let’s open up to it.

Take a good deep breath and receive that energy that’s yours. No more holding back. No more fearing that energy. Receive it. It’s there to serve you.

And now, again, we’ve talked about it before, but I really, really want to bring it home today in this Shoud. There is a resistance to it, because you think to yourself, “Oh, my body hurts so much, how could I take on any more energy? It’s going to hurt even more.” Your body hurts because there is still a resistance to bringing in, to allowing the natural harmonious flow of your own energy. That’s partly why the body hurts, but also you’re going through tremendous changes going from just the human body into your Free Energy Body. Can you allow those body aches and pains instead of resisting them? Because they’re there for a reason. Something is happening.

Some of you have been holding your own energy at bay, keeping it away, because you’re still tormented in the mind. You still have battled within yourself. As you open yourself up, you open the floodgates of energy, that energy is going to come in serving you and it’s going to – how do you say – fulfill you even in your thoughts to the point where those mind battles are going to go away. The mind battles are in part there because, well, you’re suffocating your own self. I mean, well, literally but also just consciously. In a consciousness way, you’re suffocating yourself. That creates a battleground for some of the mind games. But you open up to all the energies and those battles go away.

There’s nothing to fight for anymore. All the energy is there and it’s all yours. And, as you come back to a natural flow of energy within yourself, you start to realize that you’re never going to abuse it. It’s all yours. You’re never going to abuse it. You’re never going to use it against another person. It’s only when there is the belief that the energy is outside, that you have to get it from somewhere else, that there is abuse. But with the knowingness and the realization that the energy is all yours, when there’s that deep beautiful knowingness, there’s no desire to use it against anyone else. You don’t need anything from anyone else ever again, so there’s no abuse.

Some of you worry that with a lot of energy you’re going to abuse yourself – addictions and really crimes against yourself. You’re not going to, because suddenly you’ll realize the beauty. You’re in your own garden, so to speak. You’re in your own place. It’s all there to serve you. Everything.

Let’s take a deep breath now – a really deep breath – and open to the energy that is right there and it’s yours. You don’t have to think about it. You don’t have to get all mental about it like, “What does the energy look like?” and “Where is it coming from?” Let’s go beyond that and just breathe it in, absorb in that which is yours.

As you do so, you’re also allowing in, accepting in all of you, all of your past lives, all of your experiences, the Master within you, the I Am. You’re allowing that in. And I know we’ve talked about this a lot over the years, but today I want this to be a point of separation, a real point of separation where we’re not just talking about it anymore, you’re living it. You’re embodying that energy.

And some of you, like before we have a gathering like this, you feel out of sorts. You feel off and say, “Oh, the energy is affecting me and I’ve got headaches and my body aches and stomach aches and all sorts of other aches and pains.” You feel so out of balance, and then you push back on the energy. You won’t let it in. Let’s go beyond that today. Right now, no matter what’s going on with your body or your mind – if you think you’re going to pass out in just a moment, doesn’t matter – let’s take it on. Let’s bring it in right now. It’s something only you can do for yourself. Let’s have that friendship with energy that’s all yours.

That’s how we’re going to go forward in doing what we’re going to be doing. It’s how you come to your light body, to your embodied Realization – a good deep breath letting in that energy into your life, into your consciousness, into your awareness, into your body, into your mind, into everything. A really good deep breath bringing it in. Not thinking about it, not wondering how much you’re going to bring in. It’s not going to overwhelm you. It will not overwhelm you. It’ll put you back in a true natural balance.

Take a good deep breath with that energy. It’s all yours.


There’s still a tendency to get very distracted by outside things. Right now, the world is pretty crazy – I mean beautiful, but crazy – and there’s a tendency to get distracted with so many of these things going on around the world. And, in doing so also then to, once again, view the energy as being something outside and not wanting too much of it.

But here, right at the end of this crazy, crazy year, oh, you’ve had all sorts of things going on – the weather, the environment, the climate, the politics and finances and everything – it doesn’t matter. Let’s leap beyond that together.

Take a deep breath and allow that energy and open yourself up to what is yours. No more excuses. I don’t want any more excuses. I don’t want any more discussion of things like lack of abundance or even physical aches and pains. I mean, you’re going to have some, but it’s all a part of now being energy self-sufficient.

Take a deep breath and let it come to you like a great big tsunami, like a great big tidal wave that’s not going to kill you, that’s not going to roll you over and knock you out. Let that big wave of your energy come into your being, and then feel it. Feel what’s happening in your body and your consciousness.


Take a good deep breath. It’s all your energy and it’s here to serve you.

We’ve talked about it and we’ve talked about, but now I have to insist on it. Become it. Allow it. Let’s not play games with it anymore. Let’s not hold back on abundance or even your Free Energy Body. Let’s do it right now.

Take a good deep breath now (he takes a deep breath) and feel yourself just absorbing it, kind of like being in a spa, kind of like now you’re just letting it soak in. This is so important to go beyond the talking into the realization of your own energy. There’s nothing on the outside. It’s all yours.

There’s no waiting. There’s no delaying it. Right now is that time to accept all that energy, and not to try to manipulate it. Don’t go start telling it what to do and where to do it. Just have that experience, that beautiful experience of bringing in your energy.


And I hear a lot of you saying, “Oh, but I’ve been doing this. I’ve been doing it.” You’ve been doing it like kind of like you’ve been going through life – one foot on the gas pedal, one foot on the brake. And now we’re coming to the point there’s no gas pedal and there’s no brake. And to the human that’s pretty disconcerting. That creates a lot of unsettled feelings. No gas pedal, no brake. You don’t need a gas pedal anymore in your life. You don’t need to be hitting it or pulling back on it, because it all happens naturally. Now you’re going through life in your vehicle of consciousness, and it responds absolutely appropriately. You don’t need the gas pedal.

I understand you have self-driving cars now. You know, back in my time we were way ahead back then, we had self-driving horses. You’re finally getting to the point where you have self-driving cars, and you don’t need to work the brake or the gas pedal. It does it on its own. It knows what to do, yeah, through a lot of technology and programming and things like that. It’s the same way with your consciousness. It knows what to do. It knows exactly what to do with the energy. You don’t need a gas pedal in your life anymore, so – this is metaphorically, symbolically speaking – so take your food off the gas pedal. And you don’t need a brake anymore. 

If you were a car, you know how many brake pads you would have gone through by now in your lifetime? Hundreds, maybe thousands, always hitting the brake, even when you didn’t need to. You’d hit the brake even when there wasn’t a curve ahead or a hill that you were going down or a car in front of you. I think some of you drove through life with your foot on the brake and once in a while on the gas pedal. Let it go now. There’s no need for it.

This is – oh, sorry, Edith (he bumped her photo) – this is real trust. I mean, this is implicit trust. This is a big step in your energy dynamics. We talked about energy dynamics in our last Shoud. It’s a big step to have that much trust in yourself that there’s no more gas pedal, no more brake. You don’t even need the steering wheel, except maybe to rest your hands on. What happens now is all natural, intuitive. What happens now is all energy is responding to you appropriately.

And you know, as we’ve talked about so many times, you’re not actually moving through time and space; it’s moving through you. So why would you need a gas pedal, a brake or even a steering wheel? You’re in your vehicle of consciousness, and now it is managing how the time and space and energy flows through you. It’s managing that. You don’t need to do that anymore. Now you can enjoy life instead of having to work your way through life, instead of having to dodge the obstacles and slam on the brakes when things weren’t quite right or try to accelerate to catch up with everybody else. You let go of all of that.

Now it’s time and space responding to your energy perfectly. That’s a big step. That’s a big step, but, hey, where else is there to go, except you keep sitting in the same chair all the time.

Let’s take a deep breath and allow that now, bringing in that energy. I don’t care about the aches and the pains and the weird dreams and everything else you’re going through. That’s no reason to hold back on energy. You’re only depriving yourself of what is yours. Let’s take our foot off the brake, off the gas pedal, off the steering wheel for some freedom. You put all this together and suddenly there is a new dance of energy in your life. It’s kind of carefree. I mean, you’re still aware of the rest of the world and what they’re going through and, in a way, you still feel it, but it’s not yours. There’s no longer the worry of what happens next, where things are going to come from, “What decisions do I need to make?” You realize you don’t need to do that. There’s a natural intelligence in your consciousness and the energy responds to that without the human having to handle every little thing, without the human having to handle all the little details.

Let’s take a good deep breath with that.

Coming out of the closet with your own Realization, now opening up to the energy that’s yours, taking your head off of the control of everything you’ve been trying to control, thinking that you had to control; now feeling how everything, how the energy is all responding to this. And, again, I know, I know, we’ve talked about this again and again and you said you’ve done it. Not really. You’ve thought about it, and there’s a big difference between thinking about it and now doing it.

This Shoud is a good time for doing that. You had the example of our wonderful Edith, but who sat in the same chair, and she admits she was a stubborn old being, didn’t want to change. She had an underlying reason for not wanting to change, but she didn’t want to change, didn’t want to acknowledge that the energy was hers, to allow abundance. Didn’t want to even allow her Realization. What a great example to you, to all of us. She chose her path, indeed, but I know so many of you are looking for something different. If you have old vows and oaths, maybe it’s time to let them go. If you have an energy aversion, an aversion to energy thinking that it’s only going to make your aches and pains and your mental battles worse, let’s go beyond that right here, right now, because we have things to do.

A deep breath with that. Let’s change that whole relationship with energy.


Hm. Good.


Shine In, Shine On – Merabh

And finally, for today, ah, the day of Edith, let’s do a merabh. I like doing merabhs at the end of our Shouds. And you’re right, I don’t have a lot to say today, because everything hinges on this whole thing of energy acceptance, and I want that to be the point of today – energy acceptance.

So let’s put on a little bit of music now and do our merabh.

(music begins)

Take a good deep breath.

You’ve chosen to stay on this planet to be a Master, to experience now embodied Realization, to experience your own energy.

You’ve chosen to stay on the Earth and to shine on for others, knowing that the planet could really use it right now.

Your light of consciousness shared, spread out – not your energy, but your light, your consciousness; you’re not going around sharing energy, that would be fruitless – but your consciousness shining out to the world, illuminating for this world the new potentials that are available. And without that light of at least a few hundred, if not a few thousand embodied Masters, humanity may never see some of the other potentials that are available right now.

It’s a turning point, oh, you could say a tipping point for the planet, but you all know that. And with you shining on, there’s a good chance they’re going to see those other potentials.

Let’s first shine in before we shine on. Let’s first allow your own light to shine within yourself.

When I use the word “light,” what I mean is consciousness. It’s like a light. Let your own consciousness shine within yourself. Let it shine in upon your own energy.


Let it shine upon your own Realization. Let’s start with illuminating, with shining on the inside. In other words, let that light of your consciousness be upon you.


It’s so important to do this before even letting it be upon the world, but let it be upon you in your body, in your thoughts, in your experiences.

This light has always been there. It’s not anything that you have to try to bring in or work at. It’s always been there, but let it shine right now to every part of your being. It’s your light. It’s your consciousness.

In embodied Realization, the human continues on with their experiences.

It’s not that the human vanishes and goes away. No, the human continues on with their experiences, but now with the benefit of wisdom and with the benefit of their shining consciousness.

On this day, let your light shine within. Instead of having it out there, off there somewhere, let it be right here, shining within.

Feel your own radiance, your own consciousness.

This is you.


This very thing, this light that shines within, it’s the very thing that then brings in the energy, creates a harmony with energy and brings you everything in your life. It brings you everything that you need or want in your life.

Let that light shine within. Yeah, on your aches and pains, on your imbalances, anything that might be there, just let that light shine now without holding back anything.


This light is present here in this moment. It’s not off in some higher-self thing or another dimension. It’s right here.

It’s right here. Let that shine within all of you, every part of you.


This is what a Master does before they go out shining their light to others on the outside. They take a few minutes to shine within. They shine in before they shine on.

The Master makes sure that they’re consciously aware of their own light continuing to shine within themselves, illuminating into their body, into their mind, into their senses.

It’s easy to forget that. It’s easy to think, “Well, I have to go out and shine for the world.” But no, always take that moment to shine for yourself, the illumination of your consciousness within yourself.


And now, together – individually but together – let’s shine on to the world.

You know, I’m not a big fan of doing global prayers or global meditations or any group things, because, well, if it’s not just the right group, you have a lot of junk in there. Heh. You’ve got a lot of imbalanced energies, and that’s why very rarely do we do this kind of thing together. But as Masters now and realized beings, you’re at the point where we can sit down without agenda – there’s no agenda in this – we can sit down and simply shine on to the world.

We’re not trying to change it. See, that’s why I’ve never really liked all these group gatherings where you do a group meditation. Oh, they’re filled with agendas from people who really don’t understand what true compassion is.

But with you Shaumbra, with us now, we can be here together, connected all around the globe, and now we can shine on to the world. Without agenda, without trying to inflict change.

No, we’re not trying to create a different outcome for elections or we’re not even trying to repair the environment. There’s no place for that here.

This is the gathering of the Merlins shining on to the world, letting our consciousness open without holding back.

We’re not trying to change global warming or sex trafficking or anything like that. You’re far too wise right now for that. But we are shining a light onto the world that will show others, that will illuminate a potential to them that they might not have otherwise seen; a change, a way of changing their chair.

So, for the first time together with this gathering of you, Masters, for the first time let’s shine on to the world.

(longer pause)

No agenda. It is simply a beingness.

I hope you can feel the true peace in this. You know, if we had an agenda – we were trying to fix the environmental issues or fix the society issues – there’s really not a feeling of peace. No, because it’s still battles. It’s still causes.

But as we shine on to the world right now, feel into the peacefulness.

We’re not trying to change dark into light. We’re not trying to change the world’s financial systems. None of that. We are shining a light of consciousness, consciousness that’s been brought to the Earth, not held in the heavens; brought to the Earth by you, by realized Masters.

Let’s shine on in this moment, feeling so bold, so fearless as to bring our light forward.


As you allow yourself to shine, to radiate forth consciousness, take a moment to feel now what that’s doing to your energy.

Remember, today it’s all about taking that big step, a bold fearless step into letting your energy come in and be there and serve you. Now feel what it’s doing, as you shine on, what that’s doing to your energy.

(longer pause)

As we’re gathered here together for the first time like this in doing a shining on, a Master shine on, feel what that’s doing to your energy.


And remember the beauty of this: We’re not trying to change the world. We’re simply illuminating different chairs, different potentials that they might not have realized were right there. We’re not making them choose one thing or the other. We’re simply opening the perspective of humanity. It’s up to them what they want to do with it.

What’s happening to your energy right now?


Well, it should be – how do you say – happy. It should be dancing in the light, because this is what you came here to do.

After that long, long path in this lifetime of hardships and then releasing, of feeling lost, feeling stuck, after going through all this now, in your Realization you’re doing now what you came here to do – to shine on.

What happens with the energy now is it flows more gracefully, because we get to this point, we’re able to do exactly what you came here to do, to shine on, and now a lot of the self-doubt goes away. The self-doubt is what holds energy back, a lot of the self-doubt. You realize you’re here. You made it. You’re doing what you came here to do.

That’s another one for Merlin’s Guide to Embodied Realization: The Master shines in within themselves and then they shine on.

Doesn’t matter much what else you do the rest of the day or night, any day or any night. It doesn’t matter if you’ve got a high-powered job or you’re retired. Doesn’t matter if you do chores around the house or not. This is why you came here, to shine on for this planet.

Now feel your energy again.


Because of your own worthiness, your own coming to the promise that you made to yourself of what you would do in this lifetime, that you would allow Realization and stay in the body, there’s a different relationship now with your energy, because you’re doing what you came here to do.

There’s a new worthiness of receiving your energy.

Let’s shine on to the world.

The world is looking for a light right now, a light without an agenda, a light without rules, a light without suffering, a light of higher potentials. Let’s do it right now.


There’s a huge sense of, well, you’d call it satisfaction, of “I’m doing what I came here to do. I’ve stayed in the body. I’m now shining my light. I’m the Master whose office is the park bench or a café” or wherever you want it to be.

“I’m the Master who doesn’t have to have my foot on the brake and on the gas pedal and my hands on the wheel. I Am that I Am and I’m doing what I came here to do,” because all of you, I know you love this planet. You’ve had so many lifetimes and now comes your last lifetime. Now you just shine on.

You know your own light now, so you can shine on.


Today is about taking that big leap, allowing your own energy, and when you do then the next step is, well, shine on.

Let’s take a good deep breath on this day.

Very special thanks to Edith for sharing her story, for taking a moment to be here with us on this day. Such an inspiration, such a character, such a part of Shaumbra for so many years. Oh, Edith, I know you’ll find just the right family to come back into and I know you’ll find the lost love. But Edith, it was always you. It wasn’t somebody else – that lost love. It was always you that you were looking for.

And, dear Shaumbra, no matter how crazy things get in this world around you, remember that all is well and radiant in all of creation.

I Am Adamus of Sovereign Domain. Thank you.