Without Words

So, I told my story to Adamus without words a couple of days ago... the story itself didn't make all that much sense, it had a sort of crazy mixed up dream like quality
to it. But I did get a feel for the difference between using words to tell a story and leaving the words out.

For me, telling a story with words is like constructing something, perhaps out of legos... you build it by consciously adding one word after another. It is something fairly solid and stable. Once you assemble it, it holds that form and does not change. (Unless it is later taken apart.)

But telling a story without words is a far more FLUID process. It is more alive. It is a process, much like water flowing down a stream, moving over and around the rocks. It does not remain in any one shape, it cannot be captured and displayed. It is an experience that exists in the moment and then is gone. It is constant change, moment to moment. It is less of the mind, and more of the feelings...

Flowing, flowing, flowing...

Jaya
USA

http://www.shaumbraforums.com/ccc/viewtopic.php?f=2&t=5669&start=20

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Trust

Hi everybody! I dreamed last night about gathering with many Shaumbra so I decided to write and share something in this form, too.

I wrote here couple of months ago that it’s time to end my silent life. I chose it and it was truly coming from my heart and well - it has been everything but silence since then! I started studying - not because I should search anything anymore but it’s opening new doors, solving some practical problems and giving me support in many ways so it is actually the long waited Abundance in my life, for its part. After a long period of isolation there also suddenly seems to be so many wonderful people in my life that I’ve been lovely busy with my new social life!

The most important thing that has changed in these couple of months is Trust. It came silent, and it actually took me a while to see it’s really there but hell yeah IT IS! It’s something I’ve never felt before and on the other hand it’s something I’ve always dreamed it should be. Trust in myself. Simply.

Soon after trust came many people with criticism, attacks and negotiations, as you can guess. I was so surprised when I noticed that all those words were like air to me. I didn’t get sad. I didn’t want to run and hide. I didn’t have any kind of need to analyze their behaviour. I didn’t want to fight. I had nothing to say. It just didn’t matter. Wow.

There are still some issues and challenges and doubting voices and blaa blaa but the tone has changed. Finally I’m starting to feel and trust that it really works, not just trying to convince myself. So tonight I’m going to celebrate myself and everything I’ve been through and take good deep breath to welcome the New Year! Perhaps I’ll consider writing here more often next year Happy New Year’s Eve for You All!!!

Elina
Finland

http://www.shaumbraforums.com/ccc/viewtopic.php?f=49&t=5778

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No More Pretending

I was being a very good Shaumbra student and listening to the last Shoud again before the next one coming up. I wanted to make sure I had completed all the homework (which was already done). So I was driving along listening to the Shoud and got almost to the end and Adamus said very loudly "Stop pretending to be a student."

After the initial shock wore off a little I ask him what do I do now. How do I not be a student? That is what I am good at.

He said I could post my feelings on the message board...

Easy enough – except that I have spent my whole life and many previous lifetimes hiding who I really was. And when my true self shined through I was tortured because of it.

So my first thought was – if I am going to post anything I have to create a new user name because no one can know who I am. Still trying to hide... But I knew that I could not do that.

Now a month and a half later I am stepping out of my comfort zone. I just breathe and remember that I am not my past. It was an experience that I went through and I am now creating my reality.

I am a Master.

I am still a little nervous about this... But at the same time there is a release – I can be myself now. No more hiding and playing games to try to fit in.

Laura
USA

http://www.shaumbraforums.com/ccc/viewtopic.php?f=49&t=5147

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Winter Sleepwalk

The deep, dark dreamy winter clouds my thoughts and veils my sight.
It pulls me into its earthy cellar then leaves me there -
Alone to ponder its depths.

No...to discover my own.

I am drawn to the silence where my soul can wander and sleep and touch its fears,
Then be reminded that fears are not real.
That's why they hide in darkness;
Because in the light they are no more;
And by touching them I bring them to the light.

I sleepwalk every night and through the days of cold silence.
My soul goes with me to all realms and nowhere.
We seek to experience together and to be
One
Apart
And then to return
To Source and share our gifts and news of the Other
And what it’s like to be in dark:
Alone,
And quiet,
And separate,
And desperate, forgetting
But savoring the delicious difference my soul asked to try.

And others are curious to know.

My colors shine when spring arrives.
They birthed in winter and stay forever;
A beacon to others.

Winter is fine;
The deep dark dreamy space introduces me to myself

The best frontier.

Valerie
USA

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Declaration of Sovereignty

Hello friends,

My name is David Shoshani, 39 yo, I live in Israel (Jerusalem area) and I have been connected with the Crimson Circle since 2001. I am doing my "own" teaching work and develop the tools and the messages that best serve me and others. My personal blog/website is www.lovush.com

So, what is it all about?
In the past months I have been doing an intensive work with my aspects, integrating them, (sometimes) negotiating with them, and trying to figure out a way in which we could serve each other in the best way. I have come to realize that some aspects carry the lurking type of energy, just waiting for an opportunity to feed on me. I have found out that as soon as I dealt with one type of this lurking energy (like the sexual aspect) another popped up to check how determined I was. These kind of give-and-take negotiation with my aspects exhausted me, often threw me out of balance, brought drama into my life and generally disconnected me from the real me.

I have realized that I must exercise a different approach, a much stronger attitude towards those aspects, showing them who is in charge and what is their real place. Therefore, and following Adamus suggestion to speak up and express through my voice, I have drafted a statement - A declaration of Sovereignty that I state out loud each night before I go to sleep (and sometimes throughout the day when I feel like it).

The change was instantaneous: I immediately felt how those lurking energies leave, making room for my true being to reconnect with me. During the day my mind is no longer preoccupied with ways to figure out things; during the nights my dreams have become much clearer and the journeys into other dimensions are easier and more real.

Here is the statement:

Declaration of Sovereignty

I am who I am, [your name], Sole master of my existences.
In my domains there is no other sovereign being for I stand tall in the knowing of myself.
I and only I use the resources of who I am.
I plant myself in this now moment in which I am confident in my being and sure of my worthiness.
I am here

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11:11 Answer

I had a dream…

In this dream, I announced an answer to the question that was never asked. The answer was: You can’t impose a judgment until you place limitations…

I knew it was deep but as I breathed with this, more and more of the facets of this answer opened for me revealing the brilliance of the message delivered to me on the night of 11:11 – 2009.

Indeed, it applies to any areas of our lives. How do we know if we are pretty or not until somebody establishes criteria? Once we’ve done that, we use these to determine who wins the beauty contest.

How do we know if we healthy or not? We have a set of standards that our doctors develop for us – weight, height, family history, blood pressure – and if you are outside of this range, you must not be healthy.

How spiritual are you? If you cherish Mother Earth, eat and grow organic vegetables and live in the “Beyond Organic” community – is this enough to be qualified? Or do you have to have a daily spiritual practice to fit into this category?

Our children – what justifies a good child? Is it good grades, extracurricular activities, voluntary work and politeness? And then – what about bad children – are they everything the good ones are not?

Who is really a responsible citizen – the person who never committed a crime – does it make them eligible?

Everyone looks at these questions from a different angle and everyone has a different answer. With defining the points, lines, angles and planes of our perception, do we force ourselves to see only within those?

Maybe if we combine those different views and have a hologram of everyone’s opinion, we can see the true picture? Sounds awfully difficult to me, and I am a sucker for an easy way…

If we remove the criteria – what will we see? How will we live without boundaries, without limitations, without preconceptions of what is right and what is wrong – will there be a place for judgment?

I know my answer and next time I am ready to judge something or somebody, I will ask myself about my own limitations imposed on me by me only; and I will take the deepest breath possible and expand to the point of no boundaries and no judgment, and I will see things the way they really are.

See you there!
Valeriya Shvarts
USA

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Shadow and Light

What a blessing my Pakauwah is! Talk about trusting divine timing. I have had a huge experience of dark energy being played/experienced through my brother and his mental illness. I was feeling his play with darkness, terror and paranoia and finally said to myself “How will I survive this?” My answer to myself was, “You can experience the depths of despair, you just cannot remain there”. Over the next few days I released the trauma and used my Pakauwah to travel to my brother and other family members sending compassion, honour and light. I truly understand now to embrace the shadow - without fear, as nothing can attach to me without my permission. The peace I feel within is beyond description.

Blessings,
Wigstar
Australia

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