In my last article, I spoke of how after attending the Sexual Energies School (SES), so many dots seemed to connect. Three of them were, firstly, that my lack was self-inflicted; secondly, that I was giving so much power away to others; and thirdly, that I did not trust myself. These were a bit of a shock to me and yet so obvious when it was pointed out. I realised also how much my ego had played with me, in tandem with my aspects. There was certainly some clever liaison between them, much to my expense and frustration.
Since I shared that story, several momentous things have happened. First was Threshold, a staggering event, closely followed by Passion of the Merlin, which was truly epic, life-changing stuff. And, coming out just before those, was Adamus’ I Am Abundance Master’s Pause, also a landmark event. We know that abundance is a necessary prerequisite to, or at least part of, Realisation, so it seems important to revisit this as there are many of us who are still finding old patterns holding us back.
Adamus makes it all sound so easy; he’s good at that. But of all the many valuable pieces of wisdom in this Master’s Pause, the one that stands out for me is that I am the ‘chalice’ into which my soul, my I AM pours a constant flow of abundance, which then overflows and infuses into my reality, with any excess simply returning to the soul once more to be used again.
Some years ago, I was driving past an old coal-fired power station at Ferrybridge in Yorkshire, UK, with eight towers, each 135 metres high, with an 88 metre diameter at the base – huge! They are a massive landmark here in the UK when one is travelling northwards along the A1 Motorway. They were due to be demolished to make way for three new multi-fuel power stations. As I drove past, I could ‘see’ light pouring out of the tops of these towers, spilling over the sides and infusing itself into the tower structure. I was filled with a desire to find a way to make this become real, as a symbol to all who drove past that everything comes from within. I wrote a long proposal to the directors to save one tower, with images of what it would look like and why it would be such an amazing piece of art – maintaining the massive landmark, but with a new, inspiring and important message.
Sadly, my proposal was turned down, but have a look at the image here. It is (in my eyes) beautiful and now I see, when the dots join up, that I had designed and proposed the ‘chalice,’ with light, energy, consciousness and abundance pouring in from the I AM, only to overflow and infuse itself into our lives and prepare us for Realisation and beyond. If you want to see more images and info, go to my website.
What I have now realised is that abundance is not a ‘new’ event in my existence; rather, it has always been there. My natural state is one of abundance. What I seem to have been doing is holding a shield above my head so that it has been deflected away from me, the human. How crazy is that? I have now put down the shield and allow it to pour into me. However, daily I note the shield has crept up again and I need to consciously lower it once more. My mind is so brilliant at pulling me back into its own reality.
In the latest Shoud, Merlin I Am 1, Adamus said something that was profound: (to paraphrase), “If you look at your bank account and it’s empty, it is because you have been giving it away to everyone else, not considering yourself worthy. Feel into the energy and allow it to change in order to serve you.” This flummoxed me for a whole day – what did he mean? This certainly wasn’t happening with the money itself, so what else? Then it dawned on me: it’s the energy, not the money that counts. And I have been giving masses of energy away to others, particularly through a charity of which I have served as chairman for many years. Luckily, and at last, I have now found a willing successor, so can finally start really serving myself. Yet, as I begin to step away from a role that has given me so much distraction and purpose, I feel vulnerable and notice issues of worthiness beginning to emerge.
Looking back at my art from years past, another drawing stands out which I now know related to me personally. I now see it as a red ‘judgement’ table, with a hole in the centre for me to stand in, surrounded by the same three obelisks that were in the drawing ‘The Journey’ (shown in my previous article). Perhaps these aspects are the judges? What was I being judged for? As I think about it now, it would have been worthiness. I can see also that over the years, despite many clear messages from Tobias, Adamus, Kuthumi, Jeshua and Mary Magdalene, I have struggled to lift the weight of that burden of guilt and shame and, indeed, of poverty, as well as the worry that there was something wrong and perhaps inherently evil about me. It has taken time, but Adamus and Kuthumi’s constant nudging and guidance have encouraged me to reach the point I am at today, my aspects quietening and now becoming my friends.
Each morning now I breathe, re-engage with my soul, lower the shield, reset the chalice, feel the abundance welling up inside me only to overflow, infusing itself into my life. Each time I do this, it is energising and lifting. Another point that Adamus made was that if we would take the time to feel into the abundance we have amassed in 2028, we can invite it to be here, in the Now in 2020, rather than eight years away. It feels so good to know that it is already here.
It’s all about trust. I have spent years wanting to see some evidence first – it is a natural human need and we all seek it – but I recognise that this requires a whole different approach. We have to TRUST that it is already happening and then it will. Energy always serves whatever is in our consciousness at any given time, so it’s happening anyway and has done so all our lives until now, whether we like it or not. Why not, therefore, adjust the ‘content’ of our consciousness? Adamus says it is not about individual items; rather it is a STATE OF CONSCIOUNESS. The details are simply not necessary.
What I realised is necessary is that I need to shed my ‘comfort.’ What does that mean? Those of us who have struggled to get over lack may not be aware of it, but as Jeshua said to me in a channelling some years ago, ‘You have become comfortable within your lack.’
So, here’s the thing. Do I enjoy everything looking like it does now? Drab, old, unkempt, repaired and undignified? Or would I like to see it looking really lovely, warm, bright, colourful and inviting, with a real feeling of dignity? I would prefer the latter by miles, so I remind myself of this every time I look around in each space I inhabit. The detail isn’t necessary, but the ‘state of consciousness’ is. It all needs to change; I am no longer comfortable in these spaces as they are.
Recently, whilst lying in the bath, I had a visualisation that was so clear that I don’t think I will ever forget it. I took time to write it all down before some of the detail disappeared:
What appeared was me sitting in a room, self-constructed, with loose chains attached to my wrists and feet with leather straps. It was apparent that they were not placed on me by others. I had placed them on myself and was sitting in a comfortable chair. Around me a comfortable room, with windows facing outwards with amazing views all round. So I could look out easily and enjoy the view, but not really be a part of it. The door was locked and bolted from the inside. The whole room was built by me, self-constructed from beginning to end.
I could feel fear coursing through my body as I lay in the bath. My legs were tense and there was tension at the back of my neck. The fear was real, not imaginary, making me realise how much I was invested in lack.
I undid the leather straps around my limbs, allowing them to fall to the ground. I approached the windows and looked out, all round. It was beautiful. I took several deep breaths and unbolted the door. Top latch, bottom latch and the main key (all self-imposed), and stepped out into the sunlight. It was glorious. The view was magnificent. Open, bright, with an abundance of colour and smells. I looked back at the room, which looked like a container resting on sleepers, looking dull and out of place in the landscape. The more I looked at it, the further it seemed to drop back, until it looked as if it was about 50 metres away.
Then I noticed standing beside me on my left was Adamus St. Germain, on my right was Jeshua, and behind me was Kuthumi. Adamus was doing most of the talking. Behind them were a host of angelic figures, all waiting and showing their support for my step out of the box.
I began to notice/realise something else. This exit from the room was about much more than just money (though that was the issue that shouted loudest at me). It was about everything. The abundance was not limited, it embraced everything – how I acted, how I thought of myself, how I responded to others, how I saw the progress of my life, my family and everything else. I recalled a comment from Mary Magdalene in a channelling when she said to me, ‘Why do you play so small?’ Suddenly there she was in front of me, nodding and congratulating me on my progress.
I looked around. The scenes kept changing. When I was in the room, the scenes seemed to stay the same, but outside, everything could change in the blink of an eye. I saw our house. Suddenly the walls were painted, both inside and out, and all the rotting wooden sills were replaced. The garden was being better kept. The road up to the house was neat and the fencing around was all repaired or new. It looked wonderful. Inside, all was newly painted and, whilst not brilliantly tidy, was clear of damp and dust.
I saw us on holiday in Zimbabwe, in Australia, in any number of places. It kept changing. I turned and my family all walked towards me, congratulating me and giving me a great big hug. We stood there together looking at everything. Then I saw all sorts of people coming towards me. I saw suddenly the whole of Africa, and I saw the influence that our efforts would have on the future of the continent. I saw my reach to others expanding, embracing so many new people whose faces I did not know.
Then I turned and looked at the room. Adamus, who had spent his time chatting away and, as ever, cracking jokes, asked me what I wanted to do with it. I could still feel the fear in my body, but it was much less now. I felt that the room must go. I wanted it taken away. Suddenly a large forklift drove up, picked it up and took it to a kind of crematorium. The whole room was put inside the furnace. I worried about all the books I was used to and all the things I was comfortable with inside it and for a moment I wanted to rush in and save them all. Then I realised that all I needed and much, much more was outside, so I watched it burn. It literally burnt to ashes and was gone.
The landscape was now everywhere and changed according to what I was thinking. I saw a table and on it was the Bank manager. I walked up to her and, wishfully thinking, said, “Are there any debts left?” “None she said. They have all gone. You are clear. In fact your balance is looking good.”
I looked at Adamus, Jeshua, Kuthumi and Mary Magdalene and they were all speaking to me of who I was. “You are a Grand Master. Embrace it, embody it, know it and feel it. Step out and be who you truly are. You are at the centre of your universe. Create what it is that you wish to happen. You are in control.”
I was aware again of this angelic host standing behind us. All around was astoundingly beautiful and I realised that I had to trust in myself to move forward. These people were with me because they recognised something I didn’t. I need to know it and own it.
I took several very deep breaths and came out of the meditation. It had been a profound experience, charged with emotion. As I write this, I can still feel the tension in my legs. What an extraordinary experience!
This visualisation really brought my ‘comfort’ with lack to the forefront, and each time I revisit it, I am reminded of the declaration that they all made: that I am a Grand Master, this is my universe and everything serves me. I am in control.
The third image is a photo of pure beauty. It is a photograph of a crystal cave. I took my camera with me when we went visiting. Isn’t it amazing?
It isn’t, of course, though it is, I am sure, as beautiful. Any guesses of what it is?
It is a photograph of ice forming on the bonnet of my car one chilly night, an example of the abundance of beauty that is all around us in such ‘simple’ things, if we just take the time to look and see.
As I keep noticing the abundance everywhere around me and feel it infusing into my very being, I can feel myself shifting into a new plane of existence – one of abundance, joy, creation, grace and ease. And what most of us can’t see, but I know is there, is the host of angelic beings that surround each of us, urging us on to Realisation. Being comfortable with ‘just enough’ and holding a shield over our chalice must come to an end. We are, all of us, Grand Masters, and this is our time.
James Maberly is an artist living and working in Suffolk in the United Kingdom. He is married with four children. His website can be found at www.maberlyart.com where a full range of his multi-media work can be viewed, along with details on courses he runs. He is clumsy, pretty much deaf in one ear, wears a kikoy (from Kenya) regularly and loves bananas, egg sandwiches, and tea! He can be contacted via email.