Recently, there have been quite a few posts (in the Crimson Circle group on Facebook) from fellow Shaumbra regarding energy serving them – or rather NOT serving them – especially in the area of finances. It got me pondering: Why are so many of those connected to Crimson Circle still playing hide and seek with money? Why do they – and yes, me sometimes – hide from energy that is our personal clay for Creation? Maybe because we’re not sure what to create or how to express ourselves?
I’ve been going through some beautiful inner discoveries and transformations these last 6 months. It all started with that ugly word “massion.” (I mean, come on, it sounds like “mush”!) I didn’t like the word at all, but the idea behind it – passion + ‘mission’ – awakened something inside me, something that I had put into deep slumber years and years ago.
I remember a kid sitting in his room on the couch, not more than 14 years old. Suddenly his mom entered and handed him a book, its cover a deep blue. He read the title, “Don’t Think Like A Human” (by Kryon). The language was heavy, he couldn’t grasp most of it. But the feeling inside, oh, it brought rivers of tears and sweet nectar of remembrance of something that felt like Home.
There was one special paragraph in that book that told the story of a human being who was able to ‘channel’ his own Soul – in the 1980s, in the midst of the Old Energy!
The kid didn’t really understand at the time how special that was, but for some reason, it stayed with him. It went really deep. His heart said, “Oh, yes, I wanna do that too. I wanna share the wisdom of my soul with others!” But his mind frowned, “Uh, yeah. You? Look at those teachers, they are special! They all have those magical ‘contracts’ in place, they are spiritual ‘elite’ and who are you again?”
But that was the day that this kid started his Journey. That first book led to another and to another and to another, until finally, that chain of light and knowledge brought the kid, now a young man, to a place that truly felt like Home. It had an unusual name though – Crimson Circle.
Later, when he started devouring all the available materials, he discovered that those who go into new energies, who understand how to work with energy and then teach others, ‘wear’ a band of crimson. He learned that the Crimson Council is, in essence, an affiliation of teachers from all of Creation.
It rang a bell inside, a remembrance of days long gone, another era, another place. But who was he now? A 21-year-old boy – and a teacher? “What will I teach? What will I tell people? I can’t even speak publicly.” So that notion was discarded once again, hidden away in an old chest in the attic.
Years passed by as he tried all kinds of things. He was a doctor, a University ‘teacher,’ a designer, a photographer, a video editor, a translator, a no-thing doer. And all of it was a temporary delight, a temporary fascination, a skill that was nice to have and use from time to time, but never a true passion. And all that time the inner knowingness was whispering, “If I discover something that is really mine, my ‘calling,’ I will nurture it. I’ll stick with it, I’ll feel that my soul is expressing itself alongside me and finally my true abundance will flood in.”
But that ‘thing’ kept eluding him.
Until one day he met someone who he felt was on the edge of a cliff, almost ready to trust her Self and jump into the unknown, but in need of a little nudge, a bit of reassurance. And he gladly took that responsibility of being a friend on a path, a ‘mentor,’ a Standard, a loving presence. Sharing his own insights and experiences brought unexpected yet unimaginable joy to his inner being. Seeing how that sharing helped another human to open up, shed layers of old skin and soar into new dimensions of freedom, gifted him a silent realization. “It does exist! I can finally feel my passion. I can finally feel my Soul is rejoicing.”
After 15 years of seeking, doubting, worrying, processing, accepting, releasing and allowing, he finally came full circle by meeting another Soul with whom he felt brave enough to truly shine his light. Later that night, listening to a Shoud, he heard the words that he’d read dozens of times before, but at that wonderful moment, they just hit the right spot: “Your realization is a given. You didn’t have to come into this incarnation, but you did! You took all these issues on yourself to deal with them and then show others how to do it. You came here to teach, to shine your light, to show the way.”
It was the last drop that dissolved the veil of denial that was covering that fragile, pure and innocent childhood desire, “I want to share the wisdom of my soul with others!” Oh, how much he had denied that desire. How many times he had pushed it away, doubting if he was capable or mature enough; putting himself down, thinking that such sharing is only for the chosen ones. But that night he realized, “Yes, I am more than capable, I am more than special, and I am so ready.”
Then suddenly it all fell into place. “Oh, wow!” he thought. “All those seemingly random skills and talents I’ve developed doing all those seemingly random things in this lifetime actually weave a perfect magical tapestry that my Soul and I can now use to bring forth our wisdom.”
Why am I telling this story?
I want to share my own experience of not recognizing something that was always right inside me, of ruthlessly denying it because of some imprints from the past.
What if today you look back at your life and suddenly see that all your experiences, hardships, skills, talents and desires are leading you to a very specific point? The point of discovering your true passion and your innate ability to share it with others.
I just turned 32, and I often feel my buddy Yeshua poking me and saying, “Dude, you’re almost Jesus’ age. Look what I did in my 33rd year! Move your ass!”
So, I’ll poke you in return, my dear fellow teachers. It’s been a while. We’ve all endured so much on this Journey. But now, move your ass and get on with your true passion – whatever it is. And is it gonna bring you a hell of a lot of money? It sure will! Absolutely.
Nazar is an emerging teacher who feels tremendous joy in being a ‘vessel’ for the integrated wisdom of his Soul and human and sharing it with others. Since 2010 he also enjoys expressing himself as a translator, especially for words and energies of Tobias, Saint-Germain, and Kuthumi. While his ‘teaching project’ is currently under construction, you can easily reach him via Facebook or email, if you are up for a little yet deep chat.