This story relates to my experience of stepping through time that I shared in the June edition of this magazine. I shall review that experience briefly, but the real meat of this message relates to the experience of AND.
Two months ago, I was in Hawai’i attending the live events with Adamus at Villa Ahmyo. I had an experience of stepping through time to a version of me 11 years ago. That 2010 version of me was in crisis and I gave him/me the gift of AND. I did not call it that at the time, but my takeaway was that I am a human experiencing human emotions AND I am a Divine being of light holding the human through the experience of those emotions.
I still felt the hurt, the grief, the shame, the despair. But I had a new secret weapon: a compassionate energetic presence of great depth. It felt like an energetic spring of kindness bubbling forth from within me, effervescing into my being from a vast and unknowable reservoir. The hurt still hurt, but I lost my identification with the hurt, the emotions, for I am that reservoir.
I did not call this AND over the next 10 years, but once I heard Adamus talk about AND for the first time 15 months ago, I felt a resonance that this experience of holding both was a big YES. This is the way through the morass of thought and emotions.
A CURIOUS MOMENT HERE NOW
This 2021 version of me that knew about AND went back in time and taught the 2010 version of me about AND, without calling it that. Because in 2010 I experienced the presence of me stepping through time energetically. The experience of energetic messages is important to note in this moment, for there are energetic messages going out and coming in on a regular basis now. When Adamus talked about the funnel of past and future lives influencing this moment, I just nodded my head, uh huh.
For example, I was writing about love to a Shaumbra friend when I dropped into an ancient memory, one that was beyond a millennium or two ago. Ancient it was. I dropped into the experience of the first time I fell in love with a partner on Gaia. This love is magnificent. I see my Divinity mirrored within another human being and I feel this nearly overwhelming love. It brings tears to my eyes recalling this moment, for it is beautiful, this creation of love between humans.
But then the wisdom of the Soul, the masterly me sends a transmission back to this ancient me. And I am there AND I am here. This ancient me is receiving a visit from an Angel. Me. And I come with a message to him (felt like a him anyway).
“Dude, this love that you feel is really you. It is the love you have created for yourself. It has nothing to do with the other person. They may feel love too, but that is their own creation for themselves.”
There is a resistance of “But, but, but…..” from this ancient self, but then there is the AND again. Yes, it’s okay to believe the love is from them AND it is all yours. Yes, it is okay to be human AND Divine at the same time. Yes, it is okay to play in the 3D AND be an angelic being of light.
An ah hah resonates though me as I sit at my keyboard and the love I feel redoubles. The ancient me gets the message! This ah hah vibrates through all of the lifetimes, past, present and future. And I feel a sense that this really is a key lifetime, a focal point to tie a lot of threads together. All of those love affairs throughout the ages get the message that the energy is all mine. Always was. Always will be. The image of an accordion comes to me. All of the lifetimes represented in the folds of the bellows, collapsing and expanding as I listen to the sweet music of my Soul.
And, while the funnel that Adamus used to describe what is happening appeared to be one way – the past, the Soul and the future pouring in – it really is a two-way funnel (chalice?). The consciousness magnified in this moment is sent back out too. A communication. An energetic dialogue. A communion. A wonder in awe. For it is beautiful. I can reach through all of those veils that separate the lifetimes, gently through the gossamer of time and touch them as a kiss of ‘I love you,’ for there is no separation. Never was. Never will be. So be it.
AND IN DAILY LIFE
Since my crisis experience in 2010 with AND, I have begun using it in daily life, and how this comes to play during my days continues to evolve. Yesterday I had two phone calls with Shaumbra friends that inspired me to share here in the hope that my experience can be a bit of use to others.
Adamus has said that we as humans are not in charge of our evolution. But he has also said that it is up to us to choose our way in the midst of our human distractions. An apparent paradox that I would like to pull apart and perhaps unpack.
I agree that my human is not in charge of my evolution. The transmissions that I described above came from the wisdom of my Master, not some human decision. But we as human can recognize and take responsibility for dysfunctional emotion states that clutter the evolution landscape. I believe that using AND has helped me create a receptive state of being to allow this evolution.
For example, my largest customer is making changes that may preclude my little manufacturing company from continuing to do business with them; my connection with mass consciousness in the form of multinational corporations. If I lose that account, the most likely outcome is closing the doors of my business. Potential loss of income led me straight to survival panic, a very human emotional response.
While I am feeling the panic in my body, I send my mind into the breath to bring back the compassionate energy of the Soul. Allow the flood of energy to enter in and permeate the body, the whole being. I am feeling the panic AND the compassion. The panic, the human emotion of fear is not real, but the compassionate energy of the Soul IS real. My human is not in charge of what happens next. It is as if I put the infinite Divine energy in the same room as a dysfunctional human creation, and in that moment there is nothing more to do.
Consider human thoughts/emotions to be marbles that are rattling around in a glass beaker. Useless noise (unless useless noise is the desired experience 🙂 ). There is no apparent room for anything else in the beaker. I imagine that the Soul’s compassionate energy is a thick clear liquid, the consistency of honey. As I breathe in this compassionate energy, I pour this wonderful sweet elixir into the beaker and it fills all of the empty space around the marbles. Soon the marbles are completely surrounded and may be vibrating, but no longer rattling. The hands of the magi pick up the beaker and hold it.
I read the Red Lion about 6 years ago and recently reread it and was fascinated by the alchemical process of turning lead into gold. Here, in the crucible of Merlin’s hands, is the beaker of self, undergoing an alchemical process. It feels as if the full complement of all of my thoughts and emotions are contained in a ball of light right around my heart area, and that ball is being held by the vastness of my own Divinity. It feels like this alchemical process is creating a pathway for my Soul to have full access to my biology.
When the magi’s hands open, the marbles have dissolved and become one with the sweet elixir, the holy grail of an abundant state. I can easily breathe into the Dvir, connect with the vastness of self, for the emotional energy has transmuted and fueled a state of receptivity and allowing.
Did my human do this? No, absolutely not. Did my human choose to allow this? Yes, I did. After sleeping the night, I woke up with a feeling of what it would be like to be abundant without the business. So, I say yes to this and let my energy get busy on what is life after business ownership.
Circling back to the phone calls with my Shaumbra friends, I described this state of holding the emotion and the feeling of compassion together. One friend said that she did not know how to do this. As multi-dimensional beings of light, this ability of holding emotion and compassion in that state of AND seems like it would be an innate angelic sense, and now I have become curious about this. Is it a matter of not knowing how, or simply never having considered that it is possible? This state of AND seems like a critical stage of integrating aspects, or bringing healing salve to old wounded places.
It occurs to me as I write that some of the apparent resistance has to do with the old pattern of using mental capacity to resolve things, like abundance issues. It seems that the thoughts are many times holding my emotions hostage in some sort of Stockholm syndrome. Honoring emotions is not the same as feeding them. Nor do I need to judge them. They are simply my human response to energy. Allowing those old emotional states the freedom to be felt creates the opportunity for putting the marbles into the beaker for transmutation, clearing a space for the realized self to share a deep feeling of an abundant state and allowing the wisdom to be activated. Being able to feel into the wisdom of what it is like on the other side of the ‘blockage’ is the real shortcut through the forest.
I have been practicing this AND for the last 10 years. Many different emotions. Many different situations and triggers. Family. Idiot drivers. Ex-wives. Self-judgment. Dysfunctional behaviors. There is an evolution to it. A momentum. I don’t always choose it. But when I do, it is getting easier. I find it to be most effective when the emotion is raw and intense. I embrace the emotion, dive into it, feel it intensely, feel the beaker full. Then I call in the energetic support that is always patiently waiting. Always has been. Always will be. This is my human choosing to allow the energy to work for me.
I hope that this intimate sharing of what is happening inside me may encourage in you the alchemical process of evolution that we are all going through. Allowing the Divine essence more and more access through this human biology. Allowing self to be transmuted into something new, beautiful and exciting. These human thoughts and emotions have been refined over the millennia and I have believed that they are true and are me. But they are not real. When I allow them to be held in the hands of the magi, their energy can be fuel for a new and wondrous life.
Jerry Sweeten has degrees in Engineering and Philosophy. He has owned and operated a small medical manufacturing business in the Shenandoah Valley of Virginia for the past 23 years. Certified Integrative Energetic Medicine practitioner, student of the Pachacuti Mesa Tradition, Interspiritual Minister through One Spirit Alliance in NYC, wandered India with a Hindu Guru, taught Catholic school and bunches of other Makyo stuff. He enjoys writing, drawing and watercolor paints. He dreams of traveling the US (and the rest of the Gaia) to absorb the beauty of the planet in the days to come. Jerry can be contact via email, Instagram or on Facebook.